Busy

I seem to have neglected my blog over the last month. Sorry to anybody who was hoping for some more regular updates. The irony is, that any time my life gets busy and I therefore have something to write about, I simply don't have the time to blog. I think this may be the first time over about the last 3 weeks that I haven't had my day filled from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed. Firstly there was the whole thing about redecorating my room. Initially, the idea was to replace my carpet with real oak flooring. It was on special offer at Wickes and since it was almost 1/4 of the usual price it was too tempting to miss. Especially considering how worn my carpet is, especially right by my desk. Of course, doing my flooring meant that all my things had to be moved out of my room, and, given how much stuff I have, that was something of a Herculean task. The idea was that I could move my desk and TV into the spare room and, temporarily, use that as my bedroom. Things didn't exactly work out unfortunately. My desk and TV fit in the spare room just fine, but when it came to actually sleeping on the bed... Lets just say that as soon as I lay down on the bed I sunk in to it. There was absolutely no way that I could sleep in (and I really do mean "in") such a knackered bed. So, I had to continue to sleep in my room. My room with nothing in it but a bed. So, every night, I had to bring in a little bedside table with enough room for a lamp, an alarm clock and a place to put my laptop at night (I was using it to watch downloaded video file before going to sleep). Of course, being me, I had to have a TV in there too, so out came the little 14" TV on a little wheeled table. Then, the following morning, everything had to be moved out again (bed excluded) to make way for the decorating. Oh, and before any floor could be laid, it was decided that the wallpaper on the ceiling (that just sounds odd) had to be stripped, have the cracks filled in, sanded and then repainted. Of course I was the one who had to start the work on my own, because certain other parties who had promised to help, didn't want to work on a Sunday. Anyway, it finally looked like we were in a position to lay the floor there were murmurings about replacing the wallpaper too. Those murmurings quickly turned to screams when, completely by accident, my mum managed to rip off part of the existing wallpaper. All of this meant that I was without a proper room for a little over 2 weeks. A little over a week after that I've only just finished moving my stuff (most of it anyway) back in to my room. Of course then came all the extra superfluous little touches that somehow became essential to the completion of my room. New curtains (the blue ones were too dark. Apparently) new sheets (to match the curtains) and a few new storage units; essential because apparently I was no longer allowed to have any fixed shelves on the wall. This, as you can imagine, drove me mad. I spend most of my time in my room. It's my place, the only place in the house where I can be semi-insulated from all the other crap that's gong on around me. Of course it's not really my room now. Sure, I wanted a new floor, but my space is now decorated with wallpaper I didn't choose, curtains I didn't need and a complete lack of anything (DVDs and CDs aside) that really has anything to do with me. I can't even put up my Mallrats poster; ironically, because of the new picture rail it there isn't enough vertical space for it. Still, at least the door shuts (now that the door's back on) and I can, to a certain extent, keep everything else outside.

Of course, everything was exacerbated by what happened next. A few days in to my rooms refurbishment, just when I'd gone past the point of no return, I got a call from my agency. They had a temp job for me in Heston. Usually I'd have just told them that it was too far away and that I wasn't interested. However, this job required me to work in a school reception. Since, a the time, I was looking at doing a PGCE course (I won't be, on a purely logistical basis. At least not this year. 3 out of 4 university's have thus far turned me down. It looks like they were all filled up a few months ago.), so some experience working in a school would have been invaluable. So, within the first week I'd pretty much decided that I didn't want to be a teacher. Maybe it's just that the kids at that school are little shits, but there's no way that I'd want to spend my days with a bunch of ill mannered, semi-literates. Maybe I just had this completely unrealistic Dead Poets Society/Public school image of teaching (I'm not sure why. I didn't go to public school and I've never watched Dead Poets Society). Even the good kids are rude little bastards. Nope, teaching is not for me. Well, maybe I could have stomached it if I were a university lecturer, but we all know that's not a possibility.

So, at the end of the day, all I'm left with is a crappy, dull admin job that pays badly and finishes at the end of July. Of course, what I wasn't told was that my services wouldn't be required for the whole of the half term week, which is why I find myself, once more temporarily on Holiday. Yep, a weeks holiday was exactly what I needed right now.

Actually, that's sort of true-ish. Last week was particularly stressful, since I had an interview with a publishing company on Thursday. It looks like a great company and a cool place to work (they're the company that publish Record Collector. No the best music magazine around, but still...), but the job itself was just more boring Admin/Customer service stuff. Not all that different to my last job really, except the pays better and the hours were even worse, being as they were, from 8.30am until 6pm. Anyway, they seemed to really want someone who really wanted to be in the role for years to come, and that's certainly not me. Seriously, did they ever think that someone like me would be interested in staying in something that was obviously so dead end? There's no point whatsoever in me taking a job that provides no prospects of advancement. Still, they said they'd let me know some time this week or next, but to be honest I hope I don't get it. I'd be far too tempted to take the job, only to find myself in a years time, right back where I was when I quit my last crappy job. A bad move then. Shame though. i was really hoping I could use it as some sort if stepping stone into professional writing. It looks like, from what I was told at the interview by the companies MD and by my agency at a prep session the day before, that was never a possibility. Still, it's made me think that doing a journalism course might be a good idea. I'd certainly find it to be a far more rewarding career than anything I've done to date, even if the pay's meant to be crap. I could jut do with a job that doesn't make me fear the alarm clock every morning, regardless of remuneration. Besides, I think it's something that I might actually be good at; which, as far as jobs are concerned, has to be something of a novelty. They main problem is the cost. Where as with teaching I'd have been paid to do the course, with journalism I'd have to use a fair chunk of my savings (about 10%) just to pay the fees. Still, I guess it would be a worthwhile investment in my future (provide that things work out of course). Otherwise I've just got a lifetime of crappy admin roles to look forward to. Having spent two weeks doing filing and data entry I don't think I'd be able to manage a particularly long lifespan if all I had to look forward to was admin. And it's only fear that it would go nowhere that stopped me before. Ironically my inaction has led me down the path I feared anyway. Maybe some research in to courses is in order.

Oh, and today i was supposed to have a telephone interview for yet another job that sounded like it would be a nightmare. Some admin, inputting data into spreadsheets and a little bit of accounting stuff. Really not me. I got a call today that 8.30 this morning from my agency to tell me that the interview had been cancelled since they'd offered the job to someone on Friday. Maybe that's not a good portent for my future with this agency. Are they clued up to my total hopelessness when it come to jobs already?