Maybe I should just outline everything that's wrong with me. We'll start with the basics.

No job (The work I'm doing at the moment really doesn't count).

No place of my own. That means I have to live at home. With my Mum. Who has now just had a go at me for making her miserable because I'm upset.

I have more, (the depression, the geekiness, the (admittedly less over the last couple of weeks) fatness, the fact that I'm actually pretty dull and unexciting...

But, screw it. Girls are way too much trouble anyway. I always end up feeling awful afterwards and I just get the impression that the pleasure isn't worth the interminable pain.

I think what I'm saying is that if you've been missing the downbeat comedy that is my miserable excuse for a life, then you're in luck; normal service has resumed.